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“Then I overheard what Hudson said, so I’ve just been confused as to why you’d even be interested in—uh—sharing a bed with me in a million years. In any sense.”
“The way I acted when you moved in…” Derek rubbed his temple. “It was shitty. It wasn’t about you, not really, it was… I was just pissed at you for something I’m pretty sure was a misunderstanding. Look, I don’t know what happened between you and Jake, but I don’t believe for a second you would’ve actually called him a piece of shit.” Derek flinched. Why did he say that out loud? Crap.
Dylan paled. “Jake told you about that?”
“Wait… did you call him a piece of shit?” Derek froze.
“Well, technically, I guess, yeah, but… ugh—it’s a long story and I can explain—”
“What the hell, Dylan? You really got in his head.” Derek glared. “God, I can’t believe I was assuming that it all must’ve been a misunderstanding.”
Confused hurt filled Dylan’s eyes. “It’s not what you think. I didn’t want to tell you what happened for a lot of reasons, but—”
“Yeah. I can see why.” The words spat out of Derek. That fiercely protective loyalty Derek had always felt with Jake and Olive surged. He couldn’t stop himself from getting angrier. He was too damn tired and too damn angry about everything right now. He knew he was lashing out, but Dylan was in front of him and there was so much Derek kept locked inside because he was the one who was supposed to be able to handle everything. He wasn’t handling this conversation well. But he couldn’t stop himself. “And just so you know, if you ever want to pull the I’m not dating card with a guy you called a piece of shit, maybe delete ‘looking for a serious, longtime partner’ on your dating app profile first.”
“My what?” Dylan shook his head. “I wasn’t on apps when I told Jake… Jesus Christ, how is any of that your business anyway?”
“Because you apparently told my friend he was a piece of shit and then flagrantly lied to him and hurt him? How could you treat him like that? I know Jake wasn’t perfect, but he was a great person. He didn’t deserve—”
“Jake Murphy’s a great person all right. Oh, I know.” Dylan’s scoff fell into a frown. He ran a finger over a spot of peeling paint on the wall like he was checking for something Derek didn’t understand. “I’m genuinely sorry for what happened to him, but… he wasn’t…” His teeth clenched. “Ugh. It was a long time ago, but I’m not a liar. I wasn’t dating. And Christ, I wasn’t on any apps when Jake called. I barely left my house back then. I have no idea why Jake would say—”
“Okay. Bullshit.” Derek’s body went rigid. “I saw your profile. C’mon, dude. Why are you doubling down on this?”
“Doubling down?” After a long exhale, Dylan glared. “Just believe whatever you want. I was trying to explain what actually hap—you know what, I’m done. It’s fine.”
Derek’s hands curled into fists at his side. Yes, this entire conversation had gotten derailed, but all of his frustration boiled up at that “it’s fine.” Frustration about this stupid apartment. Frustration about his sister. Frustration about all the years he spent putting Jake on a pedestal. Sure, there was obviously more to the story. And Derek was probably being super unfair. But Olive was gone. His mom wasn’t returning his calls. And he just wished he could ask his dad what to do about everything, but he couldn’t. And he couldn’t stop himself from getting angrier.
Dylan paused at the front door with his hand on the doorknob. “I’m going upstairs. If you ever feel like giving me the benefit of the doubt about anything or maybe just not accusing me of being a liar for no reason like you already have several times before at this point, let me know.”
“I saw the dating app profile myself. It’s how I knew who you were when we met.”
Dylan directed a dismissive nod at the door as he opened it. “Kay.”
“Goddamn it, Dylan, if you ever say kay again like that, I’m going to…”
“What?” Dylan turned, eyebrows raised. “You’re going to what?”
“I—I—” Derek rubbed his chin. That adorable quirk of Dylan’s face punctured his pressurized anger. All of it was softly deflating. “I don’t know. Like freeze your underwear or something.”
Wryness blunted Dylan’s scowl. “We’re back to summer camp levels of maturity here?”
“Guess we are. You just shut down on me like a pouting teenager after kissing me. And now you’re saying you weren’t on an app that I saw you on with my own eyes.”
“You think I’m the one who’s immature?”
Derek gestured to the space between them. “You’re the one who seems completely incapable of just telling me how you feel about anything like a grown-ass man.”
“Because every time I want to, you make it clear that you don’t trust me or act like I’m a…” Dylan’s free hand tangled in his wild hair, and he clutched the bag under his other arm tighter. “God, I thought my trust issues were bad… fuck. I just needed time to figure out if what happened was a mistake.”
“Whether kissing me was a mistake?” Derek’s stomach dropped.
“Kissing might not be a big deal thing for you, but for me—”
“Oh, so now you’re acting like I’m some unfeeling asshole because I have an active sex life?”
“No, of course not.”
“You say I won’t give you the chance to explain? You never gave me the chance to explain how I felt about kissing you. And just because I’m not embarrassed about using apps for a little physical companionship doesn’t mean what happened between us didn’t mean something to me.”