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Monster vanished.
I doubted Erik even noticed. He scooped up the little kitten and began the important process of rubbing her soft little belly against his face and blowing raspberries.
I smiled and petted Garnet and Tourmaline while observing Erik make a fool out of himself.
“I told you he wouldn’t throw Monster,” I told Cedrick.
“So you did. I was not expecting him to go for the kitten belly right out of the gate.”
“Carbunclo belly fur is worth the risk to life and limb. Right, Garnet?” My kitten mewed and nuzzled me. Smiling, I petted her, and so she wouldn’t feel left out, I picked her up and dropped a kiss on her nose before cradling her in my arms. “It was a stupid challenge, Erik.”
“Apparently, your parents were attempting to help me with said challenge, but they were charmed, and they’re not giving up their carbunclo. I saw him about an hour ago. He’s adorable. I even forgave them for falling prey to him. I couldn’t say no to that face.”
Erik would have trouble saying no to Citrine, as he snuggled with the little girl, cooed to her, and made it clear she’d wrapped him around her little paws in two seconds flat.
Enzo chuckled. “I’ll go smooth things over for him in the station as it’s my fault he had a special delivery. I’m sure it won’t be a problem. Everyone knows your Garnet needs a friend, and how better to provide her with one? Then I’ll get out of your hair so you can get back to your day. Text me when you go in to take your test. If anyone gives you any trouble, I’ll have a word with them.”
“Thank you.”
“Glad to help. Try to be patient with the Ramonses. They’re a little cracked, but they’re a good enough sort.”
No kidding.
TWENTY-EIGHT
“He fell asleep on my shoe, Kinsley.”
Thursday, April 30, 2167
The Sapphire Ward
Dragon Heights, Wyoming
While I wanted to eat from every fast food joint in the city, my parents decided we would be having dinner with Cedrick and his family. Unbeknownst to me, the titanium dragons had a property in every ward of the city. Their Sapphire Ward home included a rather large menagerie.
Mouthy Asshole, contained in a massive glass tank, croaked upon spotting me.
Five minutes later, I wore gloves that went up to my elbows and lifted the lid, prepared to become the plaything of a venomous toad determined to rid the world of all humanity. Sure enough, he lunged for me, bit my wrist, and held on for dear life. I supported his hind legs, aware of the big bastard’s rarity.
His girlfriend, who was larger than him by a horrifying margin, observed.
If she went for me, she might be able to eat my hand without much of a struggle.
Considering that Mouthy Asshole could get a hold of my wrist, I worried what the much larger female might do to me if I allowed her to get a hold. Already regretting my life choices, I carried the toad to the nearby examination table, set him down, and petted his back, something I found he liked. After five minutes, during which my parents and Erik gaped at me in silent horror, the toad released me and settled down, pleased with his conquest. After giving him another few pets, I returned him to his cage, braced, and presented my wrist for the female.
Sure enough, she went for me like she meant it, and she had sufficient jaw strength I noticed she got a hold on me. “Aren’t you just a big girl?” I cooed to her, working my hand under her rump and picking her up so she could have a turn outside of her cage. Unlike Mouthy Asshole, she showed no sign of wanting to let me go, which meant I dealt with petting her.
Garnet and Citrine stared at me from the comfort of Erik’s shoulders. My kitten’s eyes were wide and her fur stood on end. His kitten tilted her head to the side as though trying to determine which variant of insanity I suffered from.
After thirty minutes, scratching under her chin, and promising another date, Mouthy Asshole’s girlfriend finally let me go. I returned her to her cage, gave both toads pats, and peeled out of the gloves, careful not to come into contact with the fluid they’d left after biting me.
Cedrick laughed, stayed far from me, the gloves, and the tank, and pointed at an empty bin nearby. “Put them there.”
“This is what you’ve been doing for a living?” my mother asked.
“Usually, they’re dead. I’m an undertaker for animals.” I grinned at her. “And I’m paid to do it.”
“You’re not paid as well as an actual undertaker.”